nana

shes gone.
i cant believe it.
i know i didnt have the closest of relationiships with her, and i made fun of her crazy ways.
but now...shes gone.
no more of her crazy stories.
no more of her old irish songs.
it happened so fast.
i know she was old, but i still didnt expect it.

christmas decorations!

we dont have a TON of christmas decorations up, but i have pictures of the few we do have, so i thought i would share.

here is our tree. no ornaments (yet) but we have mostly ones we made growing up that we will put up eventually...sometime before christmas...lol.

Here are our christmas candles and a cute reindeer. :)

STOCKINGS!!! Lauras, Jones' (our puppy), and mine!

Other Christmas decorations around the house.

Some outdoor decorations. :)

Hope you enjoyed this brief tour of my AZ christmas decorations!

grenade

Gave you all I had
And you tossed it in the trash,
Tossed it in the trash you did

To give me all your love
Is all I ever asked
But what you don't understand is

I'd catch a grenade for ya
Throw my hand on a blade for ya
I'd jump in front of a train for ya
You know I'd do anything for ya
Oh, oh I would go through all this pain,
Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for ya baby
But you won't do the same

why i get a flu shot...

many people have asked me why i, a 21 yr old perfectly healthy person, get the flu shot every year. i dont really feel like i should have to justify why i get it, it seems like common sense to me to get the flu shot, but i got to thinking about it and heres why...

i get it for the people i love. for people i dont know who have weakened immune systems. for everyone around me. for myself. for social responsibility. for the kids i work with on a weekly basis. but most of all i get it for laura.

that sounds weird, im sure. but i live with her. she has a weakened immune system. if she were to get the flu it could be devastating. if her mom or sister were to get the flu it could be even worse.

honestly, i dont understand why people DONT get the flu shot unless for some medical reason they cant. its simple. it barely hurts. it takes a few minutes out of your life. you can even find free shot clinics to get it if you cant afford it. i come into contact with so many people every day who it could be devastating for if they were to get the flu that for me it seems like a no-brainer.

i guess not everyone thinks like me...

same words, different tune

And I still fell for it again. And it hurt just as bad the second time. Just change the music each time and I'd probably do it a third or fouth time too. Most days it doesn't hurt, but today it does. I gave my all. Loved with all I had. Let my guard down again. And got hurt again. How?? Why?? I was so careful this time. I don't know the answer to that. So for tonight, I hurt. But I move on.

Show us your life: Livingroom!

Lets try something different tonight...Ill join in on my first ever blog hop, thanks to Kelly at Kelly's Korner, and show off our livingroom. Its nothing fancy, just live in an apartment, but it works for us. :)
Ill preface this by saying just about everything in our apartment is from IKEA.

First we have our entertainment center. We dont have cable so we have a LOT of dvd's.

Then we have our wall of photos. (This was before we put pictures in the frames.) We have a crib because my parents used to do infant foster care and my sister has two boys, 1 and 4 yrs old, who we help care for sometimes.

Last we have our couches. Oh and our ceiling fan! Big savior in Arizona. These couches are awesome because the covers can come of and be washed, and if we every choose to change colors we can easily do that too. That comes in very handy when we have a puppy and small children around.

This last picture just shows the true color of our walls. They are much more teal than they look in all of the previous pictures.

emptiness

i feel empty tonight.
like everything has been drained out of me.
im financially drained, emotionally drained, physically drained.
i have invested so much lately into everything around me, and i dont feel like i am getting anything back.
i need to get something back.
selfish as that may sound.
i need to take a minute for me.
to not worry about anything or anyone else but me.
but i feel like i have to play catch up all the time.
i worry that one morning i will wake up and everything will have moved on.
i will still be stuck working at the y, 20 years old, in college, and they will be gone.
off to their marriages or kids or new careers...
i just dont want to be left in the dust.
uuuuuugh.